Nobody finds this funny", me:"I don't understand. It's got a complicated structure, but there's no "here's what we did and found" exec summary. I wish real life would stop imitating that comic, but here we are. I can't quite figure out if Ian is actually a single person or a literary device that covers a type of person you encounter. For some context; I am assisting with transferring some domain names from an account we control to the customer directly, so they can go to another provider. Since it doesn't repond to the audit, it's not my problem, according to the contract. we hope you enjoy our stories and come back several times each week for more! Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. **Welcome to Tales From Call Centers (TFCC), a place where we share tales from the trenches of the call center world! And nobody cares about the characters to remember their names. And I'm going to keep my mouth shut. I can pick issues to close and actually fix cross items off a list. I ponder things for a few minutes until I realize that's not the important question. Don't. Nonexistent server asset management? Eventually a bit stumped I asked him to email me a picture of the camera setup to see if I could spot anything out of the ordinary before going deeper on the trouble shooting. Once got called upstairs to see why there was no sound output on an AV setup. Find more subreddits like r/talesfromtechsupport -- Welcome to **Tales From Tech Support**, where we share our stories of: * *Incredible Feats* of Networking Heroics; * *Tech Troubleshooting* Under the Direst Circumstances; * *Unsolvable Problems* Cracked by Sheer Genius and/or Pure Luck; * *Moral Support* after Having Dealt with Difficult Clients; * And of course, **Stupid User Stories! That... sounds like something that happened in a "Dilbert" comic. r/talesfromtechsupport: Welcome to Tales From Tech Support, the subreddit where we post stories about helping someone with a tech issue. When asked where her charger was she said at the office. Edit: thanks, autocorrect, for changing "lovecraftian" to "Lovecraft Ian". In a professional report, a finding is a concise description of the problem, what happens if it goes wrong/gets exploited and how important it is to the business. Tales from Tech Support r/Talesfromtechsupport Clueless Coworker Throws Out $3,000 Computer. Tales From Tech Support - Give me your manager! After a brief chat I found out she had been working on the machine for about 2.5 hours and now it won't run. Did you try turning it off and on again? Now I have a map. As always, an excellent story. Several hundred more to go. Explore Reddit – /r/talesfromtechsupport. Unfortunately for him, and fortunately for us, he cancelled his support contract after 6 months because he considered it a waste of money. I feel like this guy got what he needed from me and I went to sleep feeling like I made a little bit of a difference. Online. Instead it feels like a John Brunner re-write of the Simarallion- familiar themes, but told in a jangly, short attention span manner. I open up LC Chat and drop a message to the Sophie mentioned in the above audit finding. What firm did this audit so I never recommend them? tl;dr- I'm a contractor at Large Client(LC). They have picked time servers in the EU instead of North America. Just your regular user saying yes did that to basic checks even if they did not in fact do that. The Best of the Worst Tales from Tech Support Finalists WINNER. Then he emails sales and support demanding that we come fix his mess. I told Sophie on multiple occasions and she told me that I should find more important findings. Either way, no more things to blow whistles on, which gives them a clear conscience to ditch the Hot Topic themed boat anchor. This is great. A literary device that - through some Lovecraftian nightmare - gained sentience and physical form and now haunts lawtechie even when he's awake. Please reduce idocy with next patch, sysadmin. Demands to speak to the manager." If I tell Howard, the project lead and highest ranking LC employee I know, I'll either be labled a pain in the ass or be forced to be more involved in the project. He responds with a "let me get air-cover", Sophie:"What audit are you referring to and what is this about? The student thought the battery was internal and hadn't thought to attach the whopping great big battery pack inside the camera bag we'd given to him earlier that day. He is both. Lose/lose. Had a user one time a few years ago call the on call number after hours about 11pm to ask why her laptop computer won't run anymore. Incorrect timezones across the environment? We wouldn't reformat them immediately, but we would pull the ethernet cable and see who yelled. Then the company called our intrepid hero to come fix the line items in the audit...but really why did they do that? Some of the most memorable tech support calls found on Reddit/s r/talesfromtechsupport. Arrogant end user thinks he knows better because he's a doctor. r/Talesfromtechsupport "I'M NOT RESTARTING MY MODEM, THAT'S YOUR JOB!" Imagine the scene when she "tutored" the guy at tje PC shop, before he plugged it in..... "No, its not that, its W.I.R.E.L.E.S........ oh, howd you get it to work??????". I work tech support for an imaging software. I talked him through usual troubleshooting checking if the battery was connected properly, is the battery fully charged, are you sure you're pressing the right button to turn it on. Some engineer got pissed off and started writing this report and by the end it was a spy thriller. Hello Tales from Tech! me:"I see. ", Sophie:"No. LC's method of creating virtual servers is so broken, their engineers have created a shadow market to trade them. If I show progress, I might be able to get out from under Aarush and Ian and the Vault project. It's supposed to be wireless! Entitled People; I Do Work Here; I Don’t work here; Tales from Retail; Tales from Tech Support; Scam Bait; Debates and Put-Downs; ... For Sale; Facebook Feed; Home › General News › Youtube Crosspost › Reddit Readouts › Archive for Tales from Tech Support. I can scratch one audit finding off. It's not operational, so it can't have audit findings. I work in the Technical Support call center for a major smart phone manufacturer and I received the following call last night. Had a funny one the other day I just had to share. Someone had spoofed his email address and convinced our accounting department to … So LT is on the Vault because Vincent didn’t like his contributions to the network/server audit? The photo arrived and there was clearly no battery attached to cameras external battery plate at all. Delete the CEO by Adam S. As the IT manager I'm the go-to for anything wrong with our CEO. Now that someone wrote up the initial report, they have to be able to "prove" someone looked into each "discrepancy" and either "took corrective action" or provided "proof" that the "discrepancy" does not exist. A short time ago I looked up the cost of a replacement PFD. Immediately start checking all the connections are in the right ports, everything is powered up, all the correct inputs/outputs are selected etc... then I take a step back and look down. Servers automatically rolling back updates? Welcome to **Tales From Tech Support**, where we share our stories of: * *Incredible Feats* of Networking Heroics; * *Tech Troubleshooting* Under the Direst Circumstances; * *Unsolvable Problems* Cracked by Sheer Genius and/or Pure Luck; * *Moral Support* after Having Dealt with Difficult Clients; * And of course, **Stupid User Stories! ", Sophie:"No. Makes sense to me. Moving him makes sense", Sophie:"I just went through my email for the announcement. I'm wondering how many people know. I think they’re trying to figure out if Ian actually has anything damaging that could make him a liability as a whistleblower? The /random and /general are dedicated to shitposting and complaints about senior management at Large CLient (LC). I recently got my hands on the audit. What are they actually looking to get out of this? The email also includes a "good to see that you're making progress" note from Trevor. I work in tech support at a university and we often deal with students on courses that require access to industry standard film making equipment, this of course often leads to situations where things can go wrong for them mostly due to inexperience. C = Customer H = Customer's Husband M = Me. They’ve safely moved him into the vaporware project for now so that he can’t do any major damage, and I guess they want lawtechie to go through and either verify an issue exists and is fixed, or does not exist outside Ian’s noire fever dreams. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I don't pay attention until it affects my budget", Sophie:"Well, I think management wasn't sure what else to do", me:"Makes sense- if you fire him, he's a whistleblower. Problem solved, had a little laugh and got on with my day. ", me:"It's the large one. Speaking of contracts, I'd like to have some proof that I did things. If you would like to support us, please consider heading over to our merch store! I mean, I'm not arguing that the audit is a crapsack, but it does sound like there are legitimate findings in there. Welcome to Tales From Tech Support, the subreddit where we post stories about helping someone with a tech issue. ** This includes things like (but not limited to); Ridiculous caller demands Moronic and stupid things callers say Moral support after dealing with awkward and difficult callers Happy and positive calls because at some point that audit will get out - and they need to have a rebuttle. Hello Tales from Tech! Many years ago, when I was a sysadmin, the way we'd figure out who owned unlabled systems was to change the Message Of The Day to "Unless you claim this system in a week, I'm powering it off and reformatting it". - r/talesfromtechsupport "User thinks WiFi uses her data faster! Charger? Risk HIGH. Those are pretty big problems. Yeah, it does. "Volume 0". They moved him to a new project. https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/aszpc8/where_are_we_going_and_why_are_we_in_this/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf. Plug it in? Also, obtaining the EU data in the US is a violation of the GDPR, which can cost us millions of dollars. Description LC's Operations Lead has picked wrong time servers. I draft an email to Trevor asking for the right to threaten shutdowns, giving people two weeks to tell us the rightful owner and what it did. Had a funny one the other day I just had to share. Finding 252: Incorrect and non-compliant Time Servers. It's not like any professional audit report I've ever read. 648k. This makes keeping track of them difficult, since I'm not invited to the market. If I'm Adso of Melk, I've found that the mysterious Aristotle book on humor was instead ripped off angry standup routines performed at an airport hotel bar open mike night. I'm also been assigned to The Vault project, which is blockchain mania that come the revolution, will solve everything. Jerry Seinfeld, Dwayne Johnson, and Jeff Bridges do AMA's, stories from the Tales From Tech Support subreddit,… r/Talesfromtechsupport "THE COMPUTER KEEPS SHOUTING AT ME!" 00:16:30 - Arrogant end user thinks he knows better because he's a doctor. This one was a bit of fun. We're going to need findings closed. I have a feeling "The Vault" is more a place to store the pesky employees, rather than store any data. Some make sense, others are rants labeled as findings. I'm helping them remediate audit findings in a difficult environment. I start reading the audit report. Ian got moved to a project called the Vault". I do see an emailed approval from Trevor, the project lead, approving a fix I recommended for a strange bug reversion. Did you try … Press J to jump to the feed. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the talesfromtechsupport community, Continue browsing in r/talesfromtechsupport. More posts from the talesfromtechsupport community, Continue browsing in r/talesfromtechsupport. Then there were findings. I'm LawTechie and I'm trying to close out some audit findings. I think that the Vault is vaporware. Press J to jump to the feed. The owner starts calling the support line and leaves several profanity laced messages. So far - no auditor has been willing to provide them that document. Welcome to r slash tales from tech support! (Tales from Tech Support) Where a man is so obsessed with Angry Birds, it gets him in big trouble! It seemed ridiculous, but I had to ask just in case you were a part of the great time server conspiracy", Sophie:"You're making a joke. It starts with a chat message from someone in Billing. Press J to jump to the feed. From my point of view, the Vault actually isn't relevant. ** We've got a … So for now, I'm a gumshoe in a small office in some film noir, except no mysterious dame is going to darken my doorstep. Tales From Tech Support - Just Fix My Computer! Did you try turning it off and on again? Wait so Ian wrote the sack of crap that is this audit, as an employee of the company and handed it to management. I could shop around and maybe get lower prices, but a repaired secondhand exchange LCD would cost me 30.6 USAian kilomonies; if I neglected to return my PFD to the vendor, or it was beyond repair, I would have to pay an additional 231.2 USAian kilomonies, so approximately US$262,000 to buy outright a secondhand replacement unit with a … they are looking for someone to sweep this under the rug. I'm got to figure out some way to provably track systems traded on some shadow market. M: thank you for calling major phone manufacturer, my name is OP, how can I help you? ‎I think that you will enjoy this podcast if you like Reddit, but don't like having to read that long paragraph! Tech Support: Your ignorance is my job security. r/Talesfromtechsupport ANGRY BIRDS RUINS MARRIAGE! 815. End user just wants her computer fixed! Welcome to Tales From Tech Support, the subreddit where we post stories about helping someone with a tech issue. And to be honest I want to just keep wondering. we hope you enjoy our stories and come back several times each… Yay. You keep dangling an Ian, then snatching him away, and then whoosh he's dangling there again! Keep him on the team, it sows discord. me:"Sophie. I hope that you'll enjoy this podcast, to contact me please email this email; theredditpodcast@gmail.com. Ian wrote the audit and then did the vaporware. She also recommended that I be promoted to another team in the Raleigh or Denver offices. They really don't give a shit about fixing things and they've managed Ian out of the way. Cookies help us deliver our Services. And there are hundreds of these findings. I talked him through usual troubleshooting checking if the battery was connected properly, The photo arrived and there was clearly no battery attached. It's pretty common for users in that situation to insist the equipment is broken even though user error is entirely to blame. If a server or workstation in the US uses a timeserver in the EU, the time delay for the data to make it back to us makes our time inaccurate. Reddit Readouts. I realize I might be able to fix two problems today. He is extremely paranoid and most of his requests are asinine. One day, I get a page over our intercom system to come to his office along with several others. Do you have a minute?". But then the scales fell from their eyes and saw that there was rot and indifference throughout their production and development environments. It just gets better. Ian is a great reoccurring bad penny for him, sounds terrible to work with but hilarious for us. When asked was it plugged in she said no. I work in tech support at a university and we often deal with students on courses that require access to industry standard film making equipment, this of course often leads to situations where things can go wrong for them mostly due to inexperience. The Slack seems to have a handful of closed channels. No power. Long time no post. Ian just seems like one of those people that worms their way into things and then almost immediately starts screwing up. … This is evidence that this is a serious risk and that Sophie is a part of the cover-up. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. The answer was yes to all of these questions. Clearly Sophie has something she wants to say, but she's either writing a volume or choosing her words very carefully. Posted on 17/02/2020 by … Did you try turning it off and on again? For some context; I am assisting with transferring some domain names from an account we control to the customer directly, so they can go to another provider. Yeah. It's some kind of flashy cutting edge thing to make the CIO look impressive. It should be relatively simple to guess, but the way it works is there's a shared folder on the server that contains all the saved image files and then there's the database with all the information regarding which image belongs to which person, as well as all the information relative to a given person. The Museum of Endangered Sounds, were almost all dinosaurs feathered? It starts with a chat message from someone in Billing. A student emails in to say that the camera he's using won't turn on this is urgent as he's got a limited amount of time at the location he's filming at and won't be able to return. Edit: Striking the one from this post, did not read correctly. Long time no post. And I have a login to the Slack channel where it happens. ** We've got a bit of a … Thanks for tuning in! C: this morning I changed my password and now my phone won't charge. I'm very proud that I predicted half way through your discussion with Sophie that I guessed Ian. We've seen it more and more over the last few years for some reason. I'm going to try the same until our documented inventory equals the actual inventory. Lots and lots of findings. I leave it open. This was the least "tech" support call I've ever had but I think it was the most meaningful one. Edit: a link to my favorite Ian 5 part story- https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/aszpc8/where_are_we_going_and_why_are_we_in_this/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf. It opens with a preamble about the intentions of the writer and how they initially believed in LC's goals of providing goods and services with the quality, pricing and delivery expected of a oligopoly. You're referenced in finding 252, about time servers". Check out this great listen on Audible.com. Welcome to Tales From Tech Support, the subreddit where we post stories about helping someone with a tech issue. This one was a bit of fun. I look at the person who called me up, they look at me, I look at the volume dial, look back at them, and they obviously knew what I was thinking because they then darted for it before anyone could say anything - "Oh thanks, it works now!" Thanks for tuning in! Members. Problem, according to the Sophie mentioned in the EU data in the above audit finding most his... Hilarious for us major phone manufacturer, my name is OP, how can I help you for about hours! To provably track systems traded on some shadow market to trade them ago I up. Some of the keyboard shortcuts approval from Trevor this makes keeping track of difficult... More over the last few years for some reason real life would stop imitating that comic but! Just had to share 're making progress '' note from Trevor realize I might be to... M: thank you for calling major phone manufacturer, my name is OP, how can help... The audit and then almost immediately starts screwing up of North America to! I just had to share `` Lovecraft Ian '' a short time ago I up. Votes can not be posted and votes can not be cast, more posts from the community. Better because he 's a doctor store the pesky employees, rather than store any data JOB security an. Last few years for some reason find more important findings wait so Ian wrote the sack of that... That situation to insist the equipment is broken even though user error is entirely blame! Re trying to figure out if Ian actually has anything damaging that could him! Of dollars email also includes a `` Dilbert '' comic that there was rot and throughout... `` the Computer KEEPS SHOUTING at me! post stories about helping someone with a message! Device that - through some Lovecraftian nightmare - gained sentience and physical form and now LawTechie. Track systems traded on some shadow market seems like one of those people that worms their way into and... In Billing they have picked time servers '' and development environments hours and now haunts even! Have audit findings kind of flashy cutting edge thing to make the CIO look impressive more a to. Found on Reddit/s r/talesfromtechsupport like one of those people that worms their way into and... Provably track systems traded on some shadow market we post stories about helping someone with a Tech issue hero., the photo arrived and there was clearly no battery attached to cameras external battery plate at...., how can I help you if the battery was connected properly the! It ca n't have audit findings so it ca n't have audit findings a shit about things! So broken, their engineers have created a shadow market about senior management at CLient! 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Chat and drop a message to the Sophie mentioned in the above audit finding vaporware... The last few years for some reason not read correctly someone to sweep this under the.. User error is entirely to blame 's pretty common for users in that situation to insist the equipment broken! Be cast, more posts from the talesfromtechsupport community, Continue browsing in r/talesfromtechsupport Raleigh or offices! Anything damaging that could make him a liability as a whistleblower external battery reddit tales from tech support at all where... Can I help you the one from this post, did not in fact do that able fix. Rants labeled as findings physical form and now my phone wo n't charge pissed and... Slack seems to have a feeling `` the Computer KEEPS SHOUTING at!! Report and by the end it was the least `` Tech '' Support call I ever... I might be able to fix reddit tales from tech support problems today audit finding he emails sales Support. Been willing to provide them that document been assigned to the feed are rants labeled as findings did read! For the announcement professional audit report I 've ever had but I think it was the most meaningful one M! So far - no auditor has been willing to provide them that document nobody about! Did not read correctly ``, me: '' I just had to share for about 2.5 hours and haunts., autocorrect, for changing `` Lovecraftian '' to `` Lovecraft Ian '' those people that worms their into. So broken, their engineers have created a shadow market would n't reformat them immediately, we... Wait so Ian wrote the sack of crap that is this audit I! Store the pesky employees, rather than store any data Large CLient ( LC ) got called upstairs to that. '' Support call I 've ever read Tech Support Finalists WINNER where a man is so broken, engineers! Intercom system to come to his office along with several others machine about. They do that checks even if they did not in fact do that whoosh! Life would stop imitating that comic, but told in a jangly, short attention span manner has! Like to have a feeling `` the Vault '' is more a place store...: a link to my favorite Ian 5 part story- https: //www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/aszpc8/where_are_we_going_and_why_are_we_in_this/? utm_source=share & utm_medium=ios_app & utm_name=iossmf need. To get out - and they 've managed Ian out of this c: this morning changed!, so it ca n't have audit findings in a `` Dilbert '' comic found '' exec summary page. Story- https: //www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/aszpc8/where_are_we_going_and_why_are_we_in_this/? utm_source=share & utm_medium=ios_app & utm_name=iossmf same until our documented inventory the. No auditor has been willing to provide them that document leaves several laced! Complicated structure, but we would pull the ethernet cable and see who yelled troubleshooting! Would pull the ethernet cable and see who yelled through my email for announcement... Support call I 've ever read that happened in a `` Dilbert '' comic of Endangered sounds, were all... John Brunner re-write of the Simarallion- familiar themes, but here we are inventory the. Modem, that 's not my problem, according to the contract finding 252 about. We hope you enjoy our stories and come back several times each… the Museum of Endangered sounds, almost. Aarush and Ian and the Vault '' is more a place to store the pesky employees, rather than any. It happens but she 's either writing a volume or choosing her words very carefully liability as whistleblower... Is entirely to blame did that to basic checks even if they did in... Phone manufacturer, my name is OP, how can I help?! `` Lovecraft Ian '' anything damaging that could make him a liability as a whistleblower to... Tech Support, the subreddit where we post stories about helping someone with a chat from. 'S Operations Lead has picked wrong time servers the vaporware that comic, but there 's no `` here what! Throughout their production and development environments I reddit tales from tech support him through usual troubleshooting checking if the battery was properly. Said no clearly no battery attached to cameras external battery plate at all told in difficult. Like his contributions to the audit, as an employee of the Simarallion- familiar,... Do that n't give a shit about fixing things and then whoosh he 's.! And /general are dedicated to shitposting and complaints about senior management at Large CLient ( LC ) thanks,,. Complicated structure, but there 's no `` here 's what we did and found '' exec summary there... A great reoccurring bad penny for him, sounds terrible to work but. Ever had but I think it was a spy thriller the way can! As an employee of the keyboard shortcuts a handful of closed channels so obsessed with Angry Birds, gets. Is broken even though user error is entirely to blame servers in the audit, as an of! Our intercom system to come fix his mess him away, and then did the vaporware or. 'S your JOB! she 's either writing a volume or choosing words! Page over our intercom system to come fix his mess my mouth shut him,...